We overspeculated. It doesnt matter if we were serious or if we were joking-- most of the time I couldnt tell between the two (eg, GO STANFORD!). But not only did we lose time in crapping about (hah, I think thats the most striking thing about this part of my life--crapping about both the short term and long term future), it has added a previously silent dimension of pressure, expectations.

Oh well. Into the hands of fate now, and Im going to need lots of milk tonight.